I Kinda Struggle with Impostor Syndrome (And Some of You Might be Going Through This Too!)

I don't know about you, but I feel like a fraud most of the time.

Have you ever been in a meeting with someone who's just too good at something? I mean, not 'good' in the sense of 'easy to beat', but genuinely talented, and skilled at what they do? And you feel like, "I wish I could be that good at something."

Well, it turns out that there's some science behind why this happens. As it turns out, how much we feel we deserve to be good at something is directly related to how we actually perform. In other words, our perception of our ability will always be worse than reality.

This phenomenon is called impostor syndrome.

Impostor syndrome is when you think you're not as talented as everyone else around you, and you're constantly comparing yourself to them and thinking that they're better than you are. You might think of it as being a little insecure about your talents.

It’s a psychological phenomenon in which people fail to recognize their own accomplishments, often believing that there are other factors at play that make their success possible. People (like me) with impostor syndrome may be unable to internalize or accept praise for their accomplishments, and may instead attribute them to luck, timing, or some other factor.

It's never a good feeling when you're minding your business and you find yourself wondering, "This is all wrong. I'm an imposter. They're about to call me out." Sounds familiar, eh? You are not alone.

Well, turns out that it's something we've all experienced at least once in our career, but relying too heavily on it can make us feel trapped in a cycle: We think it means there's something seriously wrong with us, and so we need to work twice as hard to prove that we belong here, which just makes the imposter syndrome worse, which makes us try even harder to convince ourselves that we belong here… and so on.

So what do you do if you've found yourself in a cycle like this?

Acknowledge that this is a thing you're feeling. Tell yourself that feeling inadequate isn't the same as being inadequate.

Break down your task into smaller, more manageable pieces—things that don't feel so overwhelming that they'll trigger your thoughts of self-doubt.

Think about the great things you've done in this area before—the things that made your manager or employer decide you were the right person for this job. Remind yourself that those skills didn't come from nowhere and aren't something you can just "lose" overnight.

Remind yourself how great you are: Honestly, I'm not even sure how other people do all the stuff they do. I'm sure if I were more capable and brilliant than them, I would be doing those things too! But I'm not. So just remember how awesome you are and the amazing things you get done.

Tell someone who will support your successes—a friend, a mentor, a coworker—what you've done recently, and ask them to remind you of your achievements when impostor syndrome starts creeping in.

Be honest about your accomplishments: Sure, maybe you're not the best in the whole world at what you do, but if other people are paying for your services, then that means that you're good enough. Stay humble without diminishing your own accomplishments!

Take everything one step at a time: You don't start out as an expert at anything; it's okay to make mistakes! Learn from them, and keep making forward progress!

Stop comparing yourself to other people. I know it's hard, but seriously! Comparing yourself is not just unhealthy; it's lazy. It gives you an excuse to not put any work into improving what you do and how you do it. It's a way of saying "I don't want to be better than anyone else—I just want to be good enough." There are a lot of people who are better than the average person. You've got to stop saying that all you need to be is average, and start getting really honest with yourself about whether you're giving your best effort.

You're not alone if you feel like a fraud at times. Many people in a variety of occupations are afflicted with some level of impostor syndrome. All we can do is reassure you that it isn't a rare disease, and don't let those thoughts get the best of you. These are just normal feelings when you have accomplished something difficult and noteworthy. Even still, it's wise to embrace these feelings and take advantage of them for future growth instead of suppressing them out of fear.